no-names-allowed.

Assessments have started, and so far so good. Just have history left to worry about, eeeeek. I realised that i have so much hidden hostility towards this certain person. And I just realised it when that person was hugging me. I don't know why. And i don't think I even care why. Its just. When she's around, I feel. Exactly. I feel "."

ANYHOOOOOOOOOOJ

on a lighter note, Nachos slept over tonight. Hoorah!

OLA.

So its a Tuesday morning, and i have my ass down in the computer lab. What a feeling ay. Tuesday, on an ungodly hour in the morning, just finished with the ict ex, and its that time of the month. Halelujah. And to top off the cherry on top, the assessments start tommorow. And to be the chocolate sprinkles and almonds all over, i have science and maths. Woooooooooh. Life is good. Okay, so enough with the sarcasm. Who would have thought that Brunei could have SO MUCH drama? Who am i kidding? It's Brunei. Course there's so much drama, that's the only excitement we gett around here. But you know. Once in awhile, you get tired of all the shite. When you just want to lay back and take a sip of your lemon ping. You can't. You know why? Cause your phone won't stop bloody ringing from people calling to say, omg that bitch lksheofiboaewihbt;oserlykgnslkey. SO SICK OF ALL YOUR SHIT. please LAH. Have some self-pride. Nobody give's a shit, so why should you? And you. What do you want, honestly?

MONDAY SHMONDAY.

- I just realised that is it actually not monday.
- I woke up in the morning again today. Just like yesterday. And the day after that, and the day after that. And the day after that.
- I've been going to the gym everyday straight now just cause everbody hates me being, geewow, FAT.
- The gymming is not helping one bit.
- My exams are next week and i have not studied for shit. Eeeeeeeeeek.
- My jis entrance exams are next week too.
- I went to the gym with Anisha this morning. And geewow, ate funbread right after.
- In approximately 2 hours, i will have to be at the lobby of terrace hotel (which i might add, i very shite).
- I will be spending 3 days there. With no internet. And god forbid i'd be stuck in a room with tch. Apiza. or/and dil.DO. ha-ha-ha-ha.
- I am now watching friends with baby bushuk and alai nishi. I just farted.
- I really don't know why i'm bulleting my today.

-

fits of sneezes.

"Holy held the blue cotton sweater to her face and the familiar smell immediately struck her, an overwhelming grief knotting her stomach and pulling at her heart. Pins and needles ran up the back of her neck and a lump in her throat threatened to chock her. Panic took over. Apart from the low hum of the fridge and the occasional moaning of the pipes, the house was quiet. She was alone. Bile rose to her throat and she ran to the bathroom, where she collapsed to her knees before the toilet".

What would you do if the person you loved the most in the world, died? Knowing that the person, who you planned to spend you life with.. had just ended his/her life? That you'd never get to run your fingers through his soft hair, never share a secret joke across the table at a dinner, never cry to him when you've just had a bad day and just needed a hug; you would never share a bed with him again, never get to hear or be woken up by his fits of sneezes each morning, never laugh with him so much your stomach would ache, never fight with him about what movies to rent. All that would be left is a bundle of memories and an image of his face that becomes more and more vague each day.

... I wouldn't know what to do.

monthsary.

when i'm old and gray, sitting in a rocking chair on my front porch, hearing nothing but the soft creak of wood against wood. i want more than anything to be able to turn to you, take your hand in mine and look into the face of the once i fell inlove with long ago. happy monthsary my one in a million..

i really am not a morning person. from the wee hours of 6-12, i am a sleep-deprived-psycho-bitch. ma comes opens the door to my room, knocks on it like a mad bull until we get so irritated that we end up getting up. but if that doesnt work, she'll turn the aircon off, draw the drapes, open the window, switches the radio on reaaaaaaaaally loud. (is it just me or does the word radio look misspelt? aah, its just me) OR. she just says, "ada msg. baca eh". that gets me and dana to jump off our beds. stupidlkaehgolwheygohy love you ma. annen theres the lecture otw to school. from JALAN MUARA to BANDAR FUCKING SERI BEGAWAN. ya allah ya tuhan ku.

its 250AM, and ive got schl tmrw. whoooooooooooooopdie-i'msoexcitedimgnapissmypants-doo. i'll mebe continue tmrw.

psssssssssssssssssss: iza's. pls don't still iza's work.

orange apples.

i've told every little star, just how wonderful you are. why haven't i told you?

we need someone to love,
we need someone to hate,
we need someone to survive;
we need someone to blame.

wooterings.

UNDER CONSTRUCTION.

iza and her d.

you have to understand why.

have i told you..

okay. forget that shit that i said about having the hari raya spirit. i do not have the hari raya spirit. i have only gone to one house. vat vhite vhis vhat?!

so. today was a loooooooooooooooong day. woke up cause aida showed up in my room and im like wtf. HAHA. no. wait. i don't feel like blogging anymore. yes kaka ya, LAUGH. HAHAHAHAHA.

goodnight beautiful people of brunei :) mwahs.

cepat pulang cepat kembali.

cepat pulang..
..cepat kembali;
jangan pergi lagi.. .

remember when i came over and stole your guitar hero?
remember when i came over and fell inlove with your little brother?
remember the first time i met your dad?
remember the first time i met your mom?
remember the first time i met tita emma?
remember the first date?
rememeber the first time we had an argument?
remember the first kiss?
remember when you left for croatia, and you saw me cry?
remember when you came back?
remember when you came back, you came to my house and saw me cry again?
remember how i would go to jis just to see you?
remember kantut?
remember bantal palok?
remember 060706?
remember the note i kept in my pillow case?
remember the shirt you gave me that i wear to sleep at night?
remember when we went to the beach and both of us got stung by jellyfishes?
remember our first picture with idris?
remember the first time you bought me credit?
remember how we used to go to besteastern to get my books?
remember when you first met my parents?
remember when i sang to you?
remember when you sang to me?
remember when you met little daniel?
remember our first sungkai?
remember when you gave me a bouquet of lillies?
remember us?
.. and all we used to be?

brighter than sunshine.

its 724PM. i have not left the house yet. i'm in my baju kurong. my parents are out. my little cousin, daniel is bugging me. i don't kno where danial is :(

so. little daniel was looking through my shite and this happened:

daniel: so bad. u smoke. *holds up a packet of ml he found in the locker*
me: :| :| :| :| :| :| *THINKING WHAT THE FCKING FCK*, its not mine. its abangs.
daniel: abg smokes?
me: uh yes.

what the fuck kan yo. amai jua tu. hahahahahahahaha. so. tmrs ze open house, but fr some effed reason people came to the house today. we had no food prepared. no softdrinks. just soya bean. sounds like a happy raya to me (:



selamat hari raya, maaf zahir dan batin my darlings.

cause you and i both; loved.

so. i finally had some shut eyes aaaaaaaaat. around 6. blah.

guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuueeesst what. that stupid of a fatherfucker; nelly has not finished with our baju kurongs. puki wah yo. and no, we did not send our kains too late. she's just really stupid.


19; a brand new insight, a new day.. says:
"why wont u fly?" thers no strings attached to it.
19; a brand new insight, a new day.. says:
its a kite sayang. you need strings to make it fly.
happy raya everyone; forpgibing is to be porgetting says:
HAHAHAHA I KNO RIGHT I SAID THAT TOO. HAHAHAHA

hokai. i gotsta go mandeyyyy. happy raya again, beautiful people of brunei.

wake up and smell the coffee.

happy raya everyone.

amanda's leaving in less than 5 hours, and i'm gna miss her. we're gna miss her. fuck the fact that its gna be for a week saja. baie wah, kaka ku wah tu. have a safe flight my kaka bighose. mwah.. alai loves you (:

anyway.

its raya and we're all in the spirit. cept that its the first ever raya without abang and i miss him. we hope you're fine and everything is swell in lufbra bang. went out tonight. well, yesterday night really since its 5AM in the morning already and for some effed up reason i can't go to bed. nyeh. i was talking to skankyhanky awhile ago. talked about tongue piercing and i've decided to do it. either when i'm piss drunk or when i have ice wrapped around my tongue 24/7. but yes. i will get my tongue pierced. if i can't wait til jan2nd. we'll get hakiim to do it for free, but if i do wna wait. we'll wait till skankyhanky comes back from singapore as an apprentice body piercer. WOOOOOOOOOOOOT.

i was chatting with kakayayers too. panat wah anak atu. but i love her nonetheless. according to a few number of people. we look alike. some even think we're sisters. whatever. i see her as my sister anyway, and whoever efs with me SHE WILL FLICK BACK TO CHINA. hahahaha. okay nda cali. well if u dont get it la. ;p

lookie at dan's and i punye surprisee prom kakatersyg i:


FUCK THE CHINGCHONGERS, no? ;p

goodnight all. selamat hari raya everyone, forgive me. for my wrong doings. lets forget the past and live the present. and look porward por whats in store for us in the future. man. that was sucha long sentence to type. friggin hell. fuck me.

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMWAH, muchos love everybody.